With Genius away in Olathe, Frig II has been churning out ice cubes like a champ. No more do I go to his door and find bareness that would embarrass Old Mother Hubbard herself. My Bubba cups overflow, and my 44 oz Diet Cokes are stoked with extra chill throughout the day.
The devil, however, has been acting as activities director for Genius's too-idle hands this week. I got a text from him Tuesday morning. Genius, that is. Not the devil. He's not exactly placing an order for Frig II's forbidden fruit for all those steaming souls he's dealing with. The devil, that is. Not Genius.
"Your GPS order has shipped. Expect it in a day or two."
"Okay. Your check is in the mail."
"I got it yesterday. Won $8 too."
"How could you get it that fast? I mailed it Saturday at 11:00."
"UPSP on point."
"It's the tax dollars you provided."
"I think I got all mine back."
"Then I am the provider. You are the freeloader. Aren't you supposed to be working?"
"I have to make a presentation board for the 'intern expo.' It's like I'm a middle school science fair participant, but for a Fortune 500 company. If they don't want me doing real work, I feel fine texting."
"'It will be like science fair,' is what I was actually typing. Slowly."
"Step up your typing game and maybe I won't outwit you so consistently."
"That is asking a lot. My New Delly is aging ungracefully, which weighs heavily on my mind."
"I've offered to build you a new one."
"I think that is necessary. I want it yesterday." (Let the record prematurely show that I have been having hang time issues with Firefox on my desktop computer. More than two windows open, and I freeze. It's sucking up 94% of my physical memory. The computer's memory, too! Heh, heh.)
"You can have it in three weeks."
"At what cost? Also, I will be back to work in three weeks. It will be hard for me to learn new tricks while preoccupied."
"I can get you a cost estimate tonight, but probably around $300-$400. It will also depend on how pretty a case you want."
"Don't care. It will be buried in my office."
"We will discuss it more tonight."
"That is presumptuous."
"So is you presuming I'll build it. Mayhap I'll scam you and up all the prices 10%"
"You already volunteered! I want a little bit of your finger blood in it." (Let the record show that Genius is notorious for injuring himself while working on projects such as installing a new video card in The Pony's old desktop.) "You won't cheat me. The thrill of opening up fresh packages of electronic gewgaws will be enough for you."
"Drat. She knows my one true weakness."
"Well, that. And slipping on your excessively-sweaty palms and putting your teeth through your lip." (Let the record further show that Genius had a childhood kitchen accident doing parallel bar moves with a hand each on the cutting block and countertop.)
"THAT is offensive."
"I do SO love to reminisce about your childhood."
I hope he got his volcano model up and working for his presentation. Garmin ain't payin' that boy to look purty and type on his phone all morning.
Gads! Stinky feet! Ice cubes for the Devil! A new computer! Life just never lets one get a breath (disregard feet references here) in your part of the woods.
ReplyDeleteAll just smelly, cold, electronic threads in the rich tapestry that is Val's life!
DeleteBut New Delly is so new!
ReplyDeleteYou ain't a-woofin'! New Delly is only EIGHT years old! Is that a lot, in Delly years?
DeleteYou guys do have some interesting conversations.
ReplyDeleteI do believe that is your way of telling us that we are BREATHTAKING!
DeleteEighty bucks is all he got on that scratch off? "The devil is the activities director..." OMG what a line.
ReplyDeleteFrom your wishful errant fingers to Even Steven's ears--let the record show that Genius won 8 dollars, and was glad to have it, because a good Chinese meal can be had for $6 in his college town.
DeleteThat boy needs to be kept busy, or he will get into mischief.